Thursday, February 26, 2009
Wednesday, February 25, 2009
A few weeks ago I posted that I was worried that my favorite sister in law was potentially leaving the family...
My fear was reaffirmed at grandpa's funeral. She starts a new job in Apri - in Denver. I'm sad that they could not work things out. She was the only one that understood me when the rest of the family was not on my side. I may be opinionated, but thank God I had her to commiserate with!
Now for the fun stuff!!!
On Valentines Day my good friend MckMama told us about some amazing things her husband gave her on that chocolaty sweet day. I made a comment that apparently tickled the fancy of the company from which her husband bought the delictable treats he bestowed upon her, and with the threat of a giveaway, decided to do one of their own - and they chose lil ol me!!!
Saturday, February 21, 2009
Monday, February 16, 2009
If this doesn't make you laugh, then maybe you need my #3! :)
Here is what you do:
Google search, your name, with "needs" on the end. (ie: I would type "Lori needs".)
Then you write a blog post, listing the first 10 results, and your own comment to each.
Ready? Set. GO!
What "Lori Needs"...
Lori needs the angry dieter.
Well, if Lori goes on a diet, she may become the angry dieter!
Lori needs to vent.
Is this in response to me not doing my "Not Me's" today? Geesh, words spreads fast!
Lori needs help.
Really? And what made you think that? BWAHAHAHAHAHA!
Lori needs loads of laughter.
I think I got a good load of laughter today trying to make a map with the Schwanns guy! A good story for another day!
Lori needs a life.
Lori needs magic!
YAY ME! I love me a good disappearing act! I would love some magic done on the mess in my house pleaseandthankyouverymuch!
Lori needs (clearly) a gelato machine.
I don't know what a gelato machine is, but it sounds like a lot of work to make something I can buy already made in the freezer section!
Lori needs friends.
Does this go along with Lori needing a life? Again, thanks!
Lori needs a team!
YES I DO! I need a team of lipo suction doctors to donate their free time (and they will need a lot of it) to take care of that nuisance that keeps following me around!
Lori needs to quit.
HA! I knew it!
Go on, try it! Thanks Elaine! :)
Sunday, February 15, 2009
Of all stupid things, I linked myself to my jewelry blog. Whodathunk? Really though, so you don't find yourself pulling your hair out needlessly... if you notice your blog goes all upside - sidebardown - on you after posting with a lot of links, try removing the links one at a time. It took since last friggin Monday
2. I am the one that broke my neck. (no pity please, it was my own stupid fault!)
Ok, not really. I didn't break it in the sense that things are broken. But I broke it in the sense that it isn't working properly.
Remember when I told you I re-ruptured the disc in my back lifting a box on Saturday morning? Well I did not share with you the whole story. I did not share that Jim had just asked me not to lift the box that I
However, I woke up with none other than a sore neck.
Tuesday morning I found myself incapacitated and proceeded to spend the next two days (sans my Board Meeting) in bed. As the queen of chronic pain, I already had a bevy of pain meds, so I chose the ones that reduced inflammation, induced sleep, and took the edge off of pain. Heat and cold as recommended, and still no improvement.
First off, I am not as klutzy as it may seem that I am. I just have really bad luck. Or bad bones. Or bad discs as it they may be.
Since the age of 15, I have had cartilage and disc issues. It started when I was a skater as a child/adolescent. Too much jumping and landing hard on ice in skates caused disintegrating cartilage in my knees. A car accident when I was 20 caused me to bulge several discs in my neck that never healed. Unrelated to the car accident, I also have deteriorating discs in my neck, as well as 3 discs in my lower back that are either bulging, or slightly ruptured.
SON OF A MOTHERLESS GOAT!
(and please, don't apologize for my stupidity! I deserve scoldings, not pity!)
Monday, February 9, 2009
Sunday, February 8, 2009
I know, the first thing that comes to the forefront of your mind is "lady, pot shouldn't call the kettle black" to which I retort "I wouldn't be caught dead...", so there for I am more of a bowl than a pot. Call me the lid.
Before I go on, I will be the first to admit that I need to remove half a person off of my rear. But in my defense, I am not shakin' it, exposing it, or making you look at it in inappropriate ways.
So on to the show.
Bridezilla's that is. Jim loves the show because these women are seriously deranged - but this one HAS to take the wedding cake. Like a train wreck (apparently I have an affinity for train wrecks lately), I sit here, in my newly re-ruptureddiscfeetup state, watching the horrors of the half ton triplets on this afternoons episode.
There are several things that a lady of larger statute should really not wear, all of which have been displayed in this 1/2 hour episode...
Tops wth a "bolo" style overshirt.
Empire waisted wedding dresses embellished with a ribbon and tufted organza
and last but not least - A Towel - whilst getting a spray tan on national television... Just sayin...
I realize this all sounds really judgemental, but unless you watched the show, you have no idea how mind numbingly blinding this all was... NONE of the girls were less than 400 pounds.
If Fad's "gunt" post last weekend didn't get me all in a fasting mode, this show most possibly did.
Hell calleth my name loud and clear, but I digress...
That being said, I must go cook dinner!
Wednesday, February 4, 2009
Tuesday, February 3, 2009
So I can understand its animosity towards me... I hear the "you don't send me the love anymore" complaint, and I agree. I am the worst snailmailer ever born, grown, created or whatever'd.
But seriously, must you be so cruel? That is not how you win me back.
First you trip me with your rug. Break a few ribs here and there, permanently scrape my knee, and make my opposable thumb feel a little less than posable.
Then you sick that mean old Postmaster on me when I tell him I have pain. And oh how I had pain. He didn't care. He was more concerned that I was going to sue him and that he had too much paperwork to fill out and went all "littleoldladiesshouldntbeoutinthisweatherfallingdownonmysidewalkswhataretheythinking" on me - yet, I am not little, and I sure ain't old (although Kim thinks I look 60, but that is a whole 'nother story), and what do they have to do with me anyway?
Now, when I enter your hallowed doors you send panicked whispers of "she's coming, run, hide" to all of your many little minions. And like a fart in church they spread silently away from where I stand.
Except for that one unsuspecting young lady, who was too busy on the phone to hear your warning. Apparently also too busy to see me standing in front of her at 4:20. And still at 4:25. And even at 4:29 when she reached over to pull down the "closed" sign. All while still on the phone. Making plans to go camping. In May. Because that is what we tundra living people do when the snow dissipates and the temps climb out of the freezer.
So while you don't have love for me any more Mr. Post Office, my Ebay friend really wants her package, so tell your phonechatty little friend that I do not appreciate her closing doors in my face. I may look it, but I am not a push over, and I really want service. Twenty minutes waiting for her to decide with her phonepal where they are staying, and who is renting a cabin, or staying in a hotel (which neither constitute camping by the way) in MAY, is really not good customer service. While I am often a fairly patient and understanding person, I would really like to pay for my package and leave before something large falls on me.
Thankyouverymuchsir (or madame if such is the case).
Monday, February 2, 2009
I did not tell her about the meeting the next day either. Not until the Board meeting. Then I was told that I could not tell her what they decided until today because they wanted me to have her help during the past weeks worth of events.
I was not relieved when she called in sick this morning. However it means that tomorrow I get to have the dreaded discussion with her. And both supporting Board Members have decided that unless I call them for support, I will deliver the message myself.
See these? These are cracks in the ice. Things like this when I was younger scared the daylights out of me. Especially when my dad would park me in the middle of Lake Mille Lacs in a fish house. I never wanted the heater running because I was always worried we would burn a hole through the ice and sink to the bottom. Now I hear ice shift and crack and think it sounds kind of cool. Of course, you won't find me spending too much free time out on a frozen lake anytime soon! Once a year is enough for me.
I am not looking forward to the conversation I have to have with my assistant tomorrow. I do not like letting people down. But it has to be done. So I digress.